Gosh, where do I start??? It's been a week and a half since the worst scare of my life happened. Two Sundays ago, Jerry and I were in the shop (storage garage) looking through our stored boxes. We were getting ready to pack and wanted to pull out our boxes and set them aside to add them to the stuff we will be moving. There's another level in the garage that can be accessed by a ladder. Jerry was up there in all his glory-- okay, well actually he was in his underwear and Birks. Yep, that's my hubby.
Cecilia was asleep in the house, and I had the monitor with me. Samuel was playing in the boat which is inside the shop. I was down on the ground level receiving the boxes from Jerry that he was actually tossing down onto a couch from 10 feet. He realized that one box would be too heavy to toss down onto the couch for me to grab so he decided (gulp. it still haunts me!) to bring it down on the ladder. When he went to set his feet on the ladder, and placed his weight on it, the ladder was at too steep an incline that it slipped from under him and fell, and then he fell. I think it was feet first then shoulder then head.
Immediately I ran to him, and checked him out. I knew it was not good but when I saw his face I was horrified. His eyes were glossed, and he was having trouble breathing and I saw that he had hit his head. I ran out of the shop, into our garage yelling: "HELP! HELP! HELP! HELP..." (I can't believe I left my son in the boat. He was so stunned that he stayed there and waited for me to come back) I flung the garage door to the house open and yelled to my in-laws: "Jerry fell!" My mother-in-law asked where and I said: "IN THE SHOP!" My father-in-law jumped up and was heading towards the door and I pointed to my mother-in-law and yelled out "Call an ambulance!!!" She started to make the call as we all ran out to him. But as soon as she saw her son, she screamed, and went to get Samuel out of the boat, who saw his Daddy fall. I think my mother-in-law was too stunned to make the call, or do anything.
We went to Jerry and he was turning blue and his face was bloated and he was still having trouble breathing. I asked my father-in-law to help me turn him on his side, as it seemed his tongue was blocking his airway. He seemed to have knocked the wind out of him, and he was fighting to breathe. As soon as he was able to breathe, my father-in-law called the ambulance. When I was there with him, I said over and over: "Heavenly Father, please help Jerry. Heavenly Father, Please help Jerry!" over and over... I honestly thought I was going to lose him! Then, as soon as he 'came to', would you believe that my husband tried repeatedly to get up and take off? Where he was trying to go, I have NO IDEA, but it took me and my father-in-law to keep him down. It was then when I saw he had an ENORMOUS goose egg on the back of his head. I thought okay, he's alive, he doesn't have any spinal/neck injuries because otherwise, he wouldn't be able to get up and walk, but what about his brain??? Is he going to be okay? What if he doesn't make it? What if he goes into a coma? What if he becomes paralyzed?
I was frightened at the thought, but somehow Heavenly Father helped me to be calm. I cried as the EMTs laid him on the board to brace his back and neck. What was I thinking to let him go up there? What were we thinking to not get help or back-up from his father or brother??? This is all my fault because I wanted to go in the shop to look for our stuff. What if Heavenly Father wants to take him now? What??? NO!! I made myself stop thinking as we rode to the hospital in the ambulance. I talked to the driver who told me that he was not in critical condition at the time, but that the injury on his head posed a threat... that he could eventually be in critical condition according to the lab tests.
When we got to the hospital I had already called my mom. I called his employer, and I called his cousin, Catalina who works with him. She came right away. Then I thought that Jerry might want a blessing and thought about our friend Roger. Jerry did ask for a blessing from Roger. He came, and so did our friends Austin and Linsey. When they came, he was getting a CT scan. I was scared to hear the results, but trying not to THINK. I didn't want to panic, and if anyone knows me, that is a BLESSING because I am the panicky/worry type. Roger & Austin laid their hands on his head and gave him a Priesthood Blessing. As I heard the words that Austin said in t I was relieved. He said" Heavenly Father wants you to be here to take care of your family." What more did we need, but to hear those awesome words spoken from a righteous Priesthood holder from the words of our Heavenly Father?? That was when I knew he would be okay. Then the results came from the CT scan. Dr. said: "Good news." Then I was completely relieved. He left the hospital with a hematoma contussion. He just had a concussion, and a really big bump and a really bad headache. Talk about lucky...? It wasn't luck- it was a blessing!
Days later Jerry had slept, rested, iced his head, and the swelling went down. But he was in shock, and so was I and so was Samuel. Jerry was quite somber for days, I was shaken up and teary, and Samuel was worried and had a few nightmares. I thought, how can we move on with life when something so traumatic just happened? Isn't it advised that big decisions/events should be put off when trauma happens? I felt stuck. Like I couldn't move. And I felt scared to live my life. I felt scared that Jerry just wouldn't snap out of it. I was starting to second guess our decision to move, and started to become confused about what we should do. It was depressing.
I talked to Jerry and told him many times over that whole week, how grateful I was that Heavenly Father didn't take him. I told him how I felt. He truly helped me! He talked to me about how Satan knows when we are weak and if we allow him to slip in, it can ruin us. I realized that it was up to me to make things work. The next morning I felt normal again. I thought how could I have thought to NOT let life go on? Not that I wanted to end life. Nothing like that. Just that I felt frozen in time. I told my husband the next day how thankful I was for yet another one of his "lectures" about life that made a difference for me. I love my husband. I love the gospel. I'm grateful for this experience. It has definitely made a positive impact in our family.
Some of my favorite lines from that horrific incident:
Father-in-law to me: "Don't cry, honey. He's going to be okay. The minute I saw him get up, and try to run, I knew he would be okay."EMT: "Jerry, how old are you?"Jerry: "Uh... I don't know right now."Samuel- When we asked him what happened to Daddy: (While touching his head) Daddy, mi mi... (means owie in Greek)." EMT to me: "I had told you not to say he had a concussion yet, but what he just did is a sign of a concussion."EMT to Jerry: "So, what were you doing in your underwear? Good thing you weren't naked; that would've been pretty embarrassing."Hospital worker: "It looks like a conehead. Actually, it looks like what a baby looks like when it is born.".... and life goes on...
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